A breakup can be a very traumatic time in your life. It can be incredibly upsetting and very distressing. Eventually, the heartbreak will pass as these things do. You will move on with your life and eventually into the next relationship. Your broken heart may be painful—but it can also make you brave, increase your confidence and catapult you into your future.
It would be a missed learning opportunity not to look back on your pain and learn from it. No relationship is the same, so everyone’s lessons and experiences will be entirely personal for themselves.
No matter when you had your last heartbreak, be it a year or a few months ago, even if it was yesterday, or just a few hours, you can learn so much from it.
So, what does a broken heart teach you?
11 Lessons Only a HeartBreak Can Teach You
After a heartbreak, you may feel like your world has turned upside down. It is normal to feel depressed, angry and hurt. But, do not lose sight of the essential lessons you must learn from the pain.
- To be brave
If there is anything we should all learn from heartbreak, it is that pain is inevitable. Everyone will suffer from emotional or physical pain at a point in their lives. Each one of us will experience despair and agony. Although your pain seems unbearable, it will not kill you. This experience will make you stronger mentally!
Make no mistake that until you accept pain as part of living, you will not be able to move forward. Do not create scenarios of how lonely tomorrow might be. Instead, think of what you can learn from this and how it can help you in the future. Think of yourself, not of the one that left you! Be brave! The worst is over.
- To be confident
Rejection can really sting! It makes us feel undervalued and not worthy. However, heartbreak teaches us that our self-worth should not be based on someone else’s opinion. Nothing is more important than accepting yourself for who you are. Never allow someone else to define who you are. You are one of a kind. There is nobody else like you! You are important, and you should acknowledge that. Open your arms and embrace your beauty! Feel alive and be thankful!
- To be grateful
When we are sad, we feel that everything in life is terrible, and we are in the middle of a storm. However, if you look back at the pain, you will realize that your life is all you really have. It would be best if you were grateful for it. Start counting your blessings today.
You still breathe. You are alive. You still work! Get a journal to write down a list of your blessings, even if they are hard to see. When you write down things that are still working the way they are intended to, it helps you see things clearly.
You might not feel grateful right now because of how sad you are. Nonetheless, jotting down wonderful things you are grateful for in life will show you how blessed you are. Write down the names of those who have come into your life and taught you something. It could be your siblings, children, teachers, parents, friends, coworkers, boss, neighbors, strangers, or even your ex. What lessons have you learnt from each of those people that made you who you are today?
Count your blessings every day before going you sleep and when you wake up each morning. Life is a precious gift. Please don’t take it for granted.
- To be kind and humble
Research shows that the best way to understand compassion and even feel it for others is to experience pain or heartbreak. Heartbreak can show you the darkness of despair. That will make you feel a whole new level of compassion for other people who may also be in pain, even if it is not similar to whatever you felt.
You will find yourself feeling for others and putting yourself in their shoes. Researchers agree that heartbreak or grief can actually break a person’s ego. That means when you have experienced grief, you have seen everything you thought would last forever break down and crumble right in front of you. You will realize that everyone has a sob story and that most of the people you meet are only pushing through life.
- To be present
You are here reading this article now. Do you feel that your mind is elsewhere? Many people dwell so much in the past, thinking of the nostalgia in your past relationship.
It is sad to break up. You used to enjoy moments with that someone, and now it is all gone. You must regret it much, don’t you?
But heartbreak teaches us that thinking about the past means that we are living in the past. If you want to be free, you have to come here, present, and forget the past. You don’t have to worry about the future too. Just be in the present and stay there. Enjoy the moment and be with yourself and your friends. Allow others to love you.
- To Forgive
Forgive yourself. If you believe that the end of the relationship was due to things you did, stop beating yourself up about it. Unfortunately, what is done is done, and you have to learn to let go of those feelings. If you have to try to think about the good times, you had together and be thankful instead.
If the other person is at fault, forgive them and let go of the past. Forgiveness and letting go of the past is empowering and freeing. Accept that the relationship is over. Try to let go, and let them have a chance to let you go too.
- To love yourself
When we get heartbroken, it may first be hard to accept ourselves. We may start to feel and look at ourselves from that person’s point of view. But who are you?
This question may feel difficult to answer because you are hurt. But your sadness should open your eyes to something: if you don’t love yourself, you won’t be able to love others, and no one will ever be able to love you truly.
That is one thing heartbreak teaches us. People want to help you and do good things for you, but you have to let them. You have to allow other people to love you. To do that, you must love yourself and accept yourself for who you are without placing any more demands or expectations on yourself. Allow others to love you simply because you have chosen you are worth the effort. That will help you see how extremely lovable you are.
- That you’re not alone
When we get heartbroken, the grief can make us feel alone, especially if no one is there with us with a shoulder to cry on. When we grieve, we always want someone to be there for us and listen, even allowing us to cry. We may feel alone.
However, heartbreak will teach you that you are never alone. If you are willing to talk about your heartbreak, you will realize how much you are not alone.
We are never alone, no matter what we may be going through, and if we don’t get up after a fall, the universe will not wait to pick us up. We have to open our hearts and eyes to see that we are a part of something huge.
- Self-adequacy
When you are in love, you always do things with your partner and may feel lonely if you don’t talk to them for a while. However, a breakup will teach you that you need to spend time with yourself as much as you need with others.
That is why as you ended your relationship, you kept yourself out of the other person’s way, at least until the pain of it all wears off. A breakup will teach you how to be better off on your own. Even though you need others, you may not necessarily need your ex.
- Relationships cannot survive on love alone
You may sit there moping and thinking of how much you loved your ex, and they still broke your heart. Have you realized that love is not the only key to a good relationship?
Indeed, various factors contribute to a good lasting relationship. Only a person who has experienced a ruthless heartbreak can understand that even when two people love themselves, they can settle for a mutual breakup. A breakup will help you learn what you need to build in your character or contribution in a relationship aside from love.
- That life goes on
Time is your friend. If you can accept the truths mentioned above, you will speed up the hands of time, and healing will begin. As every day passes by and you are willing to accept the truths, you will abundantly experience freedom and joy! Your dark cloud will be lifted, and sunshine will rain upon you! Allow yourself the opportunity to let go of the hands of time and see the pain go away!
Of course, no one wants to the grief of heartbreak. How can anyone knowingly choose that kind of pain? However, you must listen to it if you have the pain of heartbreak.
It holds lessons for you, and until you have learned them, they will not leave you. What have you learned from your last heartbreak? Do well to share with us. We are willing to hear about your bitter-sweet experiences.
