There are few subjects in life as complex as love. As such, relationships extend throughout a whole spectrum, going from strangers to soulmates and everything in between. But one special kind of bond that isn’t always acknowledged is the soul tie.
What are Soul Ties?
First originated in the New Age belief, the concept of ‘soul ties’ was born to describe an emotional and spiritual type of bond between two people. Although you could develop soul ties with family members, friends, co-workers, and even as much as pets, they’re most commonly known for referring to romantic connections.
Type of Soul Ties
Not all soul ties are the same. Depending on what aspect you feel most connected to someone, you may have a sexual, emotional, or spiritual soul tie. While the first one goes as far as physical contact and intimacy, the emotional aspect refers to intense feelings of attachment towards each other, and the spiritual type of soul tie involves a truly unique bond to the other person’s spirituality or religious beliefs.
Signs of Unhealthy Soul Ties
However, these kinds of deep connections are only sometimes for the better. In some cases, soul ties can turn into messy and sometimes dangerous relationships, which can lead to developing some toxic traits like jealousy, possessiveness, or even codependency. In order to spot these unhealthy soul ties, pay close attention to these signs:
Not being able to make decisions without the other person’s opinion
Self-sufficiency is as important as it can get. As much as second opinions can be useful, you should always keep them from getting above your own judgment. If you start feeling the urge to consult everything you do with that person and think your autonomy is flaking, it may be time to re-think your relationship with them.
Feeling exhausted after interacting with them
Hanging out with somebody you love should not be either stressful or demanding. When conversation doesn’t flow naturally, or when you realize you spend more time bickering than speaking to each other, you know it’s not a relationship worth keeping.
Feeling anxious when you don’t speak with the other person for long
Missing someone and wanting to talk to them is completely normal, but once it turns into a tense and uneasy feeling, it’s totally a red flag. Remember that you are two separate and independent individuals, which necessarily entails having some time for each of you to be alone. Not knowing for sure what the other person is doing at all times should never be the root of your anxiety.
How to Break Unhealthy Soul Ties
Now that you’ve spotted these harmful dynamics in your love life, it’s time to try to fix it. We know—it’s easier said than done, but it’s not impossible. Here are some useful steps you can follow to start to tackle these unhealthy soul ties.
Cut off the other person
While it may be the most challenging part, only then will you start seeing clearly. Remove them from social media, block their phone number, and, whatever you do, don’t seek them out in person. Avoiding all contact is the most effective way to guarantee your evolution.
Spend some time alone
Prioritize your own companionship for a while. It may be the time for a little getaway to clear your head. Or even a short staycation can help you reflect on your relationship and identify what exactly is making it destructive. Just take the time to think by yourself and without outsiders’ feedback.
Practice self-care
The toxic aspects of your soul tie connection may have monopolized your attention for a while, making you neglect your personal well-being. But now it’s time for you to work on yourself. Find a sport to release your tension or a hobby to focus on instead of overthinking. It will do wonders for your mental health to have different things to lean on while healing.
Where can I find healthy relationships?
Finally, now that you know how to spot the red flags in a relationship and how to get out of it, you are ready to meet new people and find a new—and healthy—soul tie. But the million-dollar question is: Where to look for, exactly?
Luckily enough, as with almost everything else in the 21st Century, you can easily find your soul tie online. No matter what your age, gender, or sexual orientation is, there are plenty of different dating apps that you can join, such as Bumble, OkCupid, and what is possibly the most famous one of all, Tinder. Whichever one you end up choosing, there’s certainly someone out there that’s perfect for you.
