How To Stop Ruminating: 10 Tips To Stop Overthinking

We don’t always have the language to describe how we are feeling or acting; we just know that sometimes we are stuck in a vicious cycle of redundant thoughts. It can be a day, week, or months of feeling like we can’t get out of our thoughts. It could even be an experience we are currently in the middle of. These repetitive thoughts are called rumination. 

When you have ruminating thoughts, you have recurring introspections about ideas that are concerning, negative, and ultimately causing you distress. Ruminating is linked to depression, anxiety, and OCD. But don’t worry: there are ways to help yourself out of this brutal cycle that you’re in. Let’s go over what you can do to aid this behavior. 

1. Self-Awareness

Step one is that you need to understand what is causing you to have repetitive thoughts. Realize that rumination is, in fact, a debilitating cycle that needs to be addressed. You can’t help yourself if you don’t recognize what is happening and how you’re feeding this malicious routine.

Once you are self-aware, you can begin the process to stop and work on your obsessive rumination. Learn what your triggers are, because once you learn what they are, you can accept them and make peace with them. You can tackle those triggers head-on if you need to face some demons.

2. Understanding The Root Cause

It is impossible to help yourself without truly getting to the root of the repetitive thoughts. Ask yourself the following questions: 

• Why that topic? 
• Why that/this moment in time? 
• Why is it affecting you so much? 
• Is it something you did? 
• Did someone hurt you? 
• Did you have a traumatic experience?
• Is it something that is happening RIGHT NOW?

Once you have the answers to these questions, you can begin to heal. It’s not just about the recurrent thoughts, but also about understanding where they are coming from, so you can stop them from keeping you up at night.

3. Take Action

Once you have recognized what the negative thoughts or memories are, it’s time to make a plan of action. Now you can focus on what it is you are thinking about that is harming your mental health and stability. After you have that down, you can start planning how to stop dwelling on these thoughts and start healing.

One way to do this can be as easy as grabbing a notepad or journal and listing your thoughts. Following that, write what the sources of these thoughts might be. Once you understand the root cause, you can begin to reflect and find ways to release them. Your support system can help you and guide you.

4. Have A Support System

You don’t have to be alone in your pain. Sharing with friends, family, or a therapist can help you get perspective. Your support system will allow you to see that you do not need to isolate yourself. If you have a fear of being judged, remember your friends are there to support you, not just for the good times. As far as therapists go, they are professionals. They are not there to judge you; their purpose is to help you.

Speaking with a friend will help distract you and make you feel loved. Speaking with a therapist will give you the tools you need to acknowledge the thoughts and then let them go. Learning to grieve, accept, and overcome the hardships that are upsetting you will come with the right support. Discovering the right language to properly communicate with those that might be affecting your ruminating thoughts will be liberating. 

You are doing yourself a disservice by isolating yourself. Of course, it is easier said than done. Changing habits like isolation and opening up aren’t necessarily easy, but it will make a world of difference.

5. Learn Acceptance

Whatever someone did to you, or you did, already happened, however big or small; there’s no changing that. If something is happening in your life right now that you know you cannot change you have to come to terms with it. 

You cannot go back in time and make it go away or change something that is certain to happen in the now. It is a harsh truth, but a truth that must be accepted. At a certain point in your healing process, it is vital to recognize this.

You don’t have to be happy about what occurred, is occurring, or “get over it,” simply accept it. We as people are resilient —you will survive the life event that sent you down this spiral. You may never be able to forgive or be forgiven, but you can push forward and be happy again. 

There are life events that we cannot prevent from happening, but you are only doing a disservice to yourself to think about the “what ifs” and “could be’s.” You are not just the mistakes you’ve made or the victim of someone who caused you pain, but you are the sum of your qualities and hardships. When it comes to inevitable change, no matter how hard, you will adapt. You are strong, and you can heal.

6. Be Kind To Yourself

Self-care is so very important to have good mental health. It is a habit everyone should have. Practicing self-care doesn’t just mean having “me time” or a “spa day,” it also implies learning to manage stressors, eating well, and being active. Ruminating can lead to depression, and when you are depressed, your body suffers too.

Depression and other mental disorders are linked to ruminating and can cause physical ailments. Self-care means taking care of your mind, body, and spirit. 

Practice mindfulness and meditation. Mindfulness will teach you to live in the present moment. Whether that is, standing under the sun, and taking note of how the warmth feels on your skin. Or focussing on the droplets of water when you’re in the shower. 

You can also take on a hobby or continue a hobby you already love. But the trick is to focus on that hobby and only the hobby. Sure, your mind will begin to wander; this is completely normal, but then recenter and refocus, soon it will be a habit.

7. Meditation

Many people have a hard time with silence and silencing their minds. We have the tendency to continually think about what our tasks are, who we plan to see, and what to do next. Meditation helps you achieve calming your mind and feeling physical relaxation.

A study in 2012 that consisted of 36 trials had 25 of them report positive outcomes for symptoms of anxiety when they were in meditation groups compared to those who were not. Overall, research has shown that meditation can change brain chemistry. This can potentially help create healthy behaviors and improve some health issues. 

8. Exercising

Ultimately, distraction is key when it comes to ruminating thoughts! Changing your focus and doing things for yourself will make a world of difference. Something that can help you to feel better and focus is exercise. It is a great tool when it comes to mental health and healing. 

Not only will you be more fit, which surely is a plus, but you will also have a boost in endorphins. For many, exercise can be such a chore. We aren’t going to lie to you. It is hard to start working out. BUT, once you do, you won’t regret it! “Exercise-induced euphoria” can positively change the stress responses of numerous hormones. 

An increase in exercise is associated with several beneficial psychological changes in people. It doesn’t happen overnight; it is something that needs to be a consistent routine. 

9. Adjusting Goals

Exercise is just one way to change and readjust habits and goals. Changing how you approach how you treat yourself, work objectives, family time, and your perspective on receiving help are vital to bettering your life. Without accepting that there are things that you cannot change and things that you must change, it will be a long road to moving forward. 

An example of changing how you treat yourself is working on your self-esteem. How do you communicate with yourself? Sometimes we don’t realize that we say things to ourselves that we would never say to a friend or family member. As we mentioned above, it is important to be kind to yourself. Especially if you are ruminating about something that you did or was done to you.

Just because something happened does not mean you shouldn’t love yourself. It doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve a good life, and it doesn’t mean that it should consume your life. Therapy can help you change behaviors; sometimes hearing it from a friend or family member isn’t enough. A third party can give you the perspective and the boost you need.  

10. Letting Go

Everything we talked about today will be the beginning of letting go of the thoughts that are debilitating your life. When we ruminate on thoughts and don’t put them to rest we continue to feed our pain and can become self-destructive. Seek help, be good to yourself, and move forward.